Family problems - sister in law. Any advice?

I don't know what is wrong with my sister-in-law, or how to deal with her, or if i should just shut-up and try to ignore her.


I am 28 and pregnant with twins, after a lot of ttc and dealing with fertility problems. My SIL has two toddlers, and had very easy pregnancies (easy conception, no morning sickness, only had a tiny bump, and fast deliveries - she tells everyone how effortless it was).


My husband and I are over the moon. However, this pregnancy has not been particularly easy for me (I was hospitalised for dehydration at 9 weeks, and am taking Rx medication for severe reflux).


My MIL always asks me how the pregnancy is going and my hubby usually fills her in on the details - good and not so good. If my MIL sympathises with me and my SIL is around, she always makes a snippy comment that we are being dramatic and pregnancy is not as hard as I am making out etc. Last week she said she was surprised that our babies were growing so well, because she was sure they would be IUGR! My MIL was not impressed and told her to settle down.


It is great that she had such easy pregnancies, and I would love to have the same. I just don't understand why she is so jealous and mean, when all our other family is so supportive.


Has anyone had similar experiences. or suggestions on how to handle her?Family problems - sister in law. Any advice?
I think she is jealous, up till now she has been the sole provider of Grand babies to your in laws, now she hasn't got that honour and to top it all your having twins!! (yay and congrats by the way!!!) So how much attention are you and your new family gonna be getting!!?? It's obvious she's as jealous as hell! You didn't say how she's your sil, is it your husbands sister or his brothers wife? Maybe you could be REALLY nice and ask her round for coffee and try to flatter her ego by asking her what her experiences were and how to handle this or that with your new Born's? My Sister is similar to her, I suffered a miscarriage in June and her reaction when I told her I was bleeding was ';been there, done that, got the t-shirt and the dvd'; because she suffered 4 miscarriages due to a chromosome disorder. I can understand her being bitter but I was in my teens when she was going thro her stuff and she lived abroad so couldn't offer much support. I'm 9 wks preg now and haven't told her yet cos I couldn't have handled it if she was nasty like that again. I think people can be so mean! Good luck with your pregnancy and take care xxx Di Family problems - sister in law. Any advice?
There such peple-just mean all the time. Just try and ignore her as much as you can. she's up to making you lose focus on your joy-your pregnancy and she's up to grabbing all the atention to herself. Enjoy your pregnancy-you will not be pregnant for ever and just give her enough rope to hang!
Maybe she is just jealous or misses being pregnant herself. But if you want to be somewhat rude if she makes a comment just tell her that shes never been pregnant with twins and that every pregnancy is different. I had horrible reflux while I was pregnant so I sympathize with you.
I sometimes feel as though my SIL's sole aim in life is to P*** me off, so I know where you're coming from.


She had excess fluid with both her pregnancies, and looked ready to pop from about 4 months, I have had normal fluid with both of mine (I am currently 24 weeks with my second child) and so am comparatively small, she just keeps going on about how I must be dieting, and how I will do damage to my baby. I am NOT dieting, obviously! I am a normal size for how far gone I am, and baby is growing well, but then she'll flip the coin and if we're eating together, she'll go on about how she's dieting (her 2nd child is now 3 months old), and how I should be careful because I don't want it to take me so long to lose the weight as it did with my first child!!!!!!!! Grr!


Anyway, they are just jealous, for whatever reason, it could be that she is broody again, or that you have a better relationship with your husband than she does with hers, and it obviously narks her that you and your MIL get on so well, or that you are receiving attention rather than her, what she seems to fail to realise, is that I'm guessing you'd probably rather have less attention, and less discomfort!!!


Good luck with everything, x
She is not in the limelight now and you are. After all, you have twins! Too bad that is the type of person that she is.


''''Communication is the key, to a happy family'''''' I learned this from my kid when she was in 3rd grade, that was 18 yrs. ago and it is the truth.


Just tell her that you are glad that things went so well with her and she has some wonderful kids....but, that this is not as easy for you and that you really would appreciate it if she could understand that.


I wouldn't know what else to say to her that wouldn't be really rude.


But you have to say something. Your MIL already knows how she is.


How about asking your MIL for advice on this. That is probably your best bet.


Good luck and take good care of yourself and yours and don't sweat the small stuff. You have lots of other things to bug you besides her. ~wink~
She sounds like the type of woman who wants all attention for herself. And you are taking away some of her spotlight, so she is trying to take it away from you by declaring you unworthy.





It is sad, really. I imagine she engages in this behavior all of the time. How do you deal with people like this? You don't give them what they want, attention. Just roll your eyes at her and move on. Don't argue with her or try to convincer her, as it will only frustrate you and add to your stress.
She sounds jealous of the attention you are getting; especially as you are having twins.





She sounds like a broken record so there is no reason why you shouldn't also be a broken record. Every time you get a comment like that calmly say that you are happy she was so lucky with her pregnancies but it is a well known fact that pregnancies are all different and some are very traumatic; especially if you are carrying double the amount of babies!





Don't worry I'm sure it is jealously as you will always be the mother of ';the twins'; in the family.
i don't have any kids so i don't know exactly know what you're going through but everyone knows delivering a baby is not a ';piece of cake';.





i would like sarcastically play around with her that it really is as easy as she says. it'll probably really tick her off so she'll get the hint, and i'm sure your mother in law and husband would get a good kick out of it.
It sounds like she's jealous because she wants all the attention to herself, and with your pregnancy, she may feel like you are just ';exaggerating'; to steal all the attention. It sounds pretty stupid but it's been known to happen. Now, the best thing you could do is to just ignore her. Or if she says something again, you could confront her and ask her what's the deal with her. Tell her that just because she had an easy pregnancy doesn't mean that you or other women will have an easy pregnancy too. All women carry differently, so just because she had no trouble doesn't mean you won't have any problems either (unfortunately). Just don't get too stressed or too worried about it because it may affect your babies' health. Congratulations by the way! I wish you the best of luck in this situation and I hope this helps you!





P.S. Be careful! If she is THAT jealous at not having all the attention to herself, who knows what she may be willing to do to get it back! Lol, I know it sounds ridiculous but its been known to happen too!