Wedding-family drama......I need advice!?!?!?

I got engaged to my fiance on our 6 year anniversary. We set the date and told all of our family's. Then two weeks later his sister got engaged to a guy she has only been dating for 3 months. She set her date, which is one month after mine, and the day before her brothers birthday! I am upset, but do I really have a right to be? I don't understand why she would pick her date so close to ours? I want her to change her date, but how do I tell her that?....or should I just live with it? Any opions or advice would be so helpful! I just feel like I have waited 6 years for my fairy tale and now she is ruining it.Wedding-family drama......I need advice!?!?!?
I understand how you feel, something similar just happend to me. I think that it basically comes down to being jealous and wanting the attention. However, I honestly don't think asking them to change the date is going to happen if jealousy is the case. It'll just add fuel to the fire. Make sure you don't let them know how you are decorating or what your dresses look like, don't give them idea's to steal. Chances are they won't end up getting married anyway after only being together that short period of time. But if they do don't let her ruin your long awaited day. Do what you can to ignore it and be the mature one, and I'm sure it'll work out for the best in the end.


GOOD LUCKWedding-family drama......I need advice!?!?!?
She picked the date to steal your thunder so yes you do have a right to be upset since you picked yours first. It sounds like any date you picked, she would try to upstage you. Try to ignore her if you can.
She's not ruining anything. You've had a VERY long time to get married - just because you waited six years, don't put that on someone else.


Be happy for her! It's different to have both a son and a daughter get married for their family, so everything will work out fine.
another family drama on stage, have you talked with her about your feelings and how this affects you and your wedding day
How is she ruining it?There are 365 day in a year and you only need one of them. Be glad she didn't set it before yours.You get to do it all first so forget it. well as you can see ...... Life really isn't a fairy tale so finish your plans and have a great wedding.I am sure she would like for you to start something by asking her to postpone hers but be the bigger person and mention nothing.
You lucky lucky girl, seriously.





My mother in law was a pain in the *** before I got married, she complained none stop about not being able to contribute to the wedding and that my mum was doing everything and she wouldnt accept that mother of the grooms dont really get to plan anything





You however are in a lovely situation where you're mother in law is going to be so distracted helping her daughter plan her big day that shes not going to have time to interfere in yours!!





Plus you get to do it first. Maybe she was being thoughtful and planned her day to be after yours on purpose to make sure she didnt step on your toes, she sounds the impulsive type and she could of easily planned her date to be before yours and I'm sure if she's truelly the attention seeking type she would of made sure she was the one to get wed first, I think your being too harsh on her, your going to be sisters in law and that can be a great relationship, why dont you use this as a bonding experience, you'll both be going through the same stresses. Have you considered doing a joint wedding or would that be too much for you?
She isn't ruining your wedding. Your wedding celebration comes first. You get the guests, all fresh and eager to give you presents and to have fun on your special day. Her wedding comes second, a whole month after yours. People aren't going to forget that you're a new bride just because she will be one, too.
Just live with it.





My cousin did this to me and I was a tad livid. She had her's before mine and ALL of the family came to it. Then two months later about half came to my wedding (which was perfect for us since we were hoping to keep it under 100 people).





She won't ruin your wedding if you don't let her. You can't allow her to make you feel some kind of way.
Do you want one day or the rest of your life? Set your date for you and your fiancee, and focus on your MARRAIGE. Stop worrying about who does or doesn't show up to a 15 minute


(I hope) ceremony, and forget about when this chick is shceduling her drama, and run your life on your own terms.
Honey, I'm in the same situation. I'm about to marry my partner of two years (engaged for 14 months!) Everyone knew about our engagement early on. My twin sister decided during that time move to our town and get pregnant (single mom by choice). Her due date is about a WEEK after my wedding which means she probably can't even come to it, and she couldn't help with wedding planning because she was ';so infirm';. Since it was a planned pregnancy and was planned after she knew my wedding date I've been pretty ticked because it steals all my thunder. Even I am more excited about the baby than the wedding - and it means we had to change our honeymoon from the Virgin Islands to a mountain cabin 2 hrs away just in case! To make matters worse she ran out of money and had to MOVE IN WITH us right before the wedding and will stay for our first 4 months of marriage (small apt, no intimacy!!).





Bottom line: yes you have a right to be ticked, but no there's nothing you can do about it. Let your sister in law wreck her own train and just have the most fun wedding you can, making it all about you. I hope it's great!
You can't make her change her date just like she can't change yours. Just enjoy the moment. Congratulations!
it depends... is she the type that HAS to be the center of attention? i would mention to her that it may not be a good idea to have her wedding so close to yours cause maybe some family members can't afford to go to one then another so close together. but stress that you aren't trying to get her to change her date but if you are going to be in her wedding you are going to need more time to be fully attentive to her wedding day along with anyone else that you two have in common that may be in the wedding. i really wouldn't be too upset over it. just tell her to consider the rest of the family and their feelings and maybe push it out another month. if she doesn't then that is her deal and don't worry about it.. you've got plenty with your own wedding.
Don't worry about it she will have broken up with him by then and you will be married to your prince charming.





Don't let this take the shine off your wonderful news, use all of your energies to plan your wedding remember you cant control what other people do so don't even try.





Congrats
Wow, you are really overreacting. You get one day, just one. Not a whole month. I'm sorry to have to be the one to let you know that.





Don't say anything to his sister. It will make you sound like a raving lunatic.





P.s.


Marriages are more than weddings, so I wouldn't put so much emphasis on that one day.
Live with it. It's a whole month after your wedding. And what's the matter with it being a day before her brother's birthday? Is that such a big deal?





I don't see that you have any right to be upset. Are your plans the only ones that matter? What about the things that matter to her? I don't see that it's a big deal at all. You can't insist that she change her plans to suit your feelings. A whole month after your wedding is plenty of time for her to have hers.


Or, am I missing something, here?
I'm guessing she's a little jealous of all the attention you're getting. Don't worry about when her wedding is. Just focus on yours and make it as big and wonderful as you want!
Four weeks inbetween isn't enough??????





Oh, the bride who has been engaged the longest decides who gets married and how long between weddings?...or gets to call 'first dibs' on the month/season/year....





';Me-me-me..I'm first and you just hafta wait your turn'





Is this about wedding dates or rights to the sandbox in the playground...





Yours is not the only wedding in the world, dear. Your SIL %26amp; her fiance have every right to select the day, month and year they wish to marry without consulting you, you know. How long they have known each other has nothing to do with it...it's as if you are saying you have the most rights here since you've been dating your guy longer....where is that law written?





...and exactly how are they 'stealing your thunder?'..oh, you have to share the wedding spotlight as now it shines on two couples instead of just you %26amp; your fiance.....not enough room there? Or you can't bear the idea of sharing the attention.....





I don't understand how this is ruining your 'fairytale wedding', dear...perhaps we need to inform ALL BRIDES that they cannot get married the same month as you are and there must be at least X amount of time between their weddings and yours.





Really.





Time to grow up, Sweetie. There is plenty of room in the sandbox for both of you to play......the bridal spotlight isn;t exclusively yours and if you expect all the attention to be on you, then you do have some issues that need to be addressed....like how this is more about the 'fairy tale' wedding and all the attention on you and you only than the marriage when it should be the other way around....think about it. You get your Day. Not the week, month, or the entire year......
That is unfortunate. I would ask your fiance to mention something to her. If you have to even play her game. Tell her how hectic is going to be for her pre-paring for her wedding and going to all your wedding before things??? If she still will not change it -- don't sweat it. It's your big day and don't let anyone ruin it!! Congrats :) :)
Unless u have family or inlaws that would have to travel big distances I wouldnt worry its a whole month after and even so I wouldnt worry ur is before and Im guessing more people would come to it.
You do have ALL the right to be upset ..I would be..It seems to me like jealousy she doesnt want the spot light on you guys..so she has to butt in..Its just wrong on her part ..I actually have a cousin that went through the same thing she got engaged then what do you know all of a sudden her sister wants to be married..planned it a month or two after hers...but my cousin stepped aside and didnt go overboard with things...it was still a really nice wedding but im sure not her dream one...it isnt fair ..the one day EVERY girl dreams about growing up...Dont do what my cousin did you need to tell her how you feel because it isnt right what she did ..and hopefully everything works out for you ..good luck !!