I need some serious advice. How do I tell my parents not to come on my family vacation?

My wife and I are taking a sort of semi-annual trip with her family, and my parents have mentioned they'd like to come. I wouldn't have any problem at all, except my parents tend to stress out my wife a bit and she'd really prefer that they didn't come. How do I tell my parents we'd prefer they didn't come when the trip has been brought up several times in front of them. If not that choice, how do I convince my wife that we'll be able to do our own thing and not have to be around my parents while on the trip if they insist on coming (we're staying at a decent size resort in Jamaica).





Again, my wife's family is coming and always have (we're more going with them), so I don't know how fair it is that my family should be excluded, but our families just vacation in very different ways. My parents do the group, everyone-together, thing and her family is very indepenent, as is she.





Please, only honest advice that you think is helpful.I need some serious advice. How do I tell my parents not to come on my family vacation?
It looks like your family is favoring your wife's family if you always go on vacation with them. I don't know if that's what you and your wife are intending but that's what it looks like from the outside.





I'd guess that it's your job to tell your parents one of two things: Either that this trip is planned to be with your wife's family and is already set up. Or that they are welcome to book this trip but that your original plans were with your wife's family so you all might not have too much time for them.





I'd guess you should discuss with your wife which path you're going to take. While you're talking about that you may want to hash out the problem of favoring one side of the family over the other. It is possible that you can plan trips with your parents next time around. However, it sounds like both your wife and your parents will have to compromise on a mix of together and separate activities if you're going to have a happy vacation.I need some serious advice. How do I tell my parents not to come on my family vacation?
I would NEVER be able to tell my parents that they could not come with us on vacation. Her parents are going, why can't yours go too.





Tell your parents that the vacation is already planned and this is the travel agent that you used and they can try to get their info from the agent and go with you.
I think it is your wife that needs to make the compromise. It would be hurtful to exclude your parents but still take your In-Laws.





Try to look up some activities that your parents can do with your In-Laws. Find a few tours. Anything to keep them busy while you and your wife have some quality time.
Well, I don't think you can tell them they can't come, after all, it IS a free country (well, semi-free). I would tell them that you've planned this trip to be with your wife's family, and that you will be spending little, if any, time with your parents. If they want to go to Jamaica at the same time as you do, and stay in the same resort, great, just make sure they have a VERY clear understanding that you will not be available to do things with them. I wouldn't tell them that they stress your wife out (although I wouldn't want to vacation with my hubby's family either), you can communicate that you'd rather they go another time when you're not going. But, if they insist, like I said, make darned sure they get it that you WILL NOT be available, under ANY circumstance (barring family emergency) to do anything with them. Then, keep your word.


Good luck, and have fun on your trip!!
Ask the question. What is it that you want. You are an adult. You are married. People only do what you let them. If you want your parents to come. Explain it to your wife that this is what you want. Marriage is a give and take. Just talk it through with her. If you do not want your parents to come. This is the time to just tell them that you and your wife are going to do this vacation alone and have some needed alone time together. They should understand. If they do not this is not your problem. They are also adults. They raised you to have your own opinion. Sometimes it is not what they want to hear but you need to tell them. Then have fun on this vacation. I am sure you deserve it.
Just explain to them that if they do come, they need to let you have your independence. If you want to go shopping, tell them that everybody doesn't need to tag along. If you want to have dinner with your wife, tell them that it's a special gift for her. Just explain that everyone vacations differently, and you'd like them to be respectful. Also, you could ask them to try and give your wife a bit more space.
If it is that big of an issue, then I would just tell your parents how you feel about the situation, and I'm sure that they would understand. If you personally dont' feel like it is a big deal if they come and you are just worried about your wife and her family, then I would invite your parents anyway. Your wife should be understanding of how you want your parents to be a part of the vactation, and if she rejects the idea, then mention how it would be selfish for her to want her parents to come and your's weren't allowed. All of this becomes easier to decide when you realize that with a large resort, you would still have your individual time, but you would also get to have quality time with your family and your wifes family, and then maybe all of the problems that your wife has with your family can be resolved. It's all up to you really! Have fun in Jamaica!!! (((LUCKY!!!)))
If its a big enough resort...then let your family come... you dont have to book your trips together...just tell them to book a trip and plane...you might not even get the same plane... and maybe just go out for dinner with them once...or hang out on the beach with them for a day... you dont have to do every thing with them...but at least no one would get excluded...and its in the middle...so every one would be some what happy





good luck


and God bless
Well I think the problem comes in organizing a vacation with EITHER set of parents, given that it doesn't work with one set. Short of that, this needed to be established in stone, that is, this time ';We're going on a trip with her parents.'; There should not have been ambiguity, and that doesn't even mean that it needed to be a negative situation, just the way it was going to be. At this point I don't see how you can tell them you don't want them to come without hurting them, and that's why it just seems that the best thing in the future is to go on vacation by yourselves, not including either set of parents, given that one set drive your wife crazy. As for this time, I think it may be better that your wife suck it up and realize in the future you have to handle it differently from the beginning.